One of those men...

What could I say about him? (Briefly description, lol...)

I meet him at the wrong time, at a bar… he looked cute and said he could dance (lol, never got to see that… wish I had)

After that… we went to a movie, and it was so nice… That day I felt like a teenager girl, he wanted to hold my hand but didn’t know how and it must have taken him half an hour to do so… And you may find it stupid, but it felt nice, sincere…

We started talking… well texting (as I told him once, he was my text-boyfriend, lol)… I got to meet a part of him, and I really liked it. And, at first I showed myself, the real me. No lies, no hidden secrets, nothing…

He said beautiful things to me… like “you are the woman I was looking for” and “I really think we have a connection here”… I used to think of these things as stupid things a guy would say… but he… he was different.

We we’re going out… (in a on & off kind of way)… he was simply amazing. It got to the point where I though “he’s the one, hell yeah… he’s all I want”… and why? Well, first he’s gringo (lol, I’ve always had a thing for gringos, sorry…), second he’s older than me (always liked older man, too)… he had a job (which means he’s not a lazy guy that would expect a woman to pay for his rent, lol…) he did his things on his time… like Sundays, Sundays was his day for football, either he went to the stadium, or he watched it with friends, and I just loved that… most women get annoyed by the fact that their men go to do something on a Sunday, instead of being with them… But, I think it’s enough to have them every single night with you, they share that special moment where you kiss them goodnight and hug each other for couple of minutes (sorry, can’t sleep with someone hugging me all night :( )… Don’t get me wrong… If I can get my man to be with me on a Sunday it’s great too…

But, I always see things in a different angle, maybe a more mature one… I can use Sunday to go shopping, lol, or spend some private time with my son… (as I normally do).

I believe that in a relationship, there has always have to be some private time, I mean everybody needs their own time… at least, I like to get mine. And, if I do get mine; why can’t he, uh?

I keep memories of him in my head, in my computer, in my cell phone. Still have his pictures, look at him and wonder if he still thinks of me… Which probably he doesn’t… but, there’s nothing I can do… I already got used to pain…

And why I said before that I meet him at the wrong time? Well, I was going through a lot of stuff that had me in mood swings, unfortunately, and I started reacting wrong… with all my problems and I started discharging all my problems on him, and I shouldn’t have, I should have looked for help, or maybe not help but at least an advice from him. And, I didn’t… I guess, my relationship with my mom, the fact that I had a baby, and the family not being able to get over it (yeah, after three f***cking years!) has affected me in a way only time could heal.